So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I am available for nakedness
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
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