You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
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