it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
