I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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