all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Randomize
