She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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