is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
