Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize
