Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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