I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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