For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
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