In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
