have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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