Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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