Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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