this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
