Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize