I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
