Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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