At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Randomize
