People with herpes should wear stickers.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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