He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
How naked do you want me to be?
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
