So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
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