I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
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