brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize