no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize