i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I need moral support for this bender
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize
