I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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