I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
Randomize
