My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize
