what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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