i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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