dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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