sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
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