He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
Blood and glitter go together right?
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
