I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
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