What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
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