I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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