I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
