i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
