i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
My vagina is officially offended.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
