i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
