He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
