if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Randomize
