You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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