oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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