my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
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