i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
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