I showed him my bush... on skype.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Randomize