so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
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